A good friend of mine is working on a project with Second Life. He is using this platform to explain about the enterprise architecture in the company. Second Life is a good name. It refers to a change - a parallel life to one that is being lived. A funny concept that seems to imply deceit. Like having a second wife and family. The past few months have affected me that I feel disoriented. Aside from the changes, the pressure of doing projects and meeting deadlines amidst the change and uncertainty should have an impact on one's psyche. But I try to rise above my work life by having an active 'second' life.
For my part, I have responded by enrolling in a gym, exercising and drinking more. A strange combination that I try to balance. I guess it is reflective of the stress that I experience. I have also increased my book reading and borrowing of audio books as well to update myself on the world. I guess it is like I m trying to make sense of the changing world around me. Instead, I am stressing my mind more and maybe end up more bewildered. But again I have an answer to that which is to do roller-blading in the park and taking guitar lessons. Both are new experiences for me and my idea is that these new experiences will allow me to biologically grow a new mind - nuerogenesis, I believe is the word. It describes the way the mind builds new connections or synapses (?) as one learns new things.
Of course, my end desire is to move to a new career. I do not feel any desire to find work in another company, although I have prepared myself for this eventuality. I have no choice really because I need to pay the bills and raise a family. What attracts me is to strike out in a new career as a writer and maybe be a teacher or public speaker. To have a portfolio life similar to the one proposed by Charles Handy I think- the English equivalent to Peter Drucker. I am attracted to the life of the writer. I recently read about the new James Bond author - Sebastian Faulks. But time moves on and I should really strive to be one instead of imagining to be one.
My Indian friend at the office mentioned that I am always preparing. Preparing for something better but never taking the leap and utilize my preparation. Maybe he is right. I spend too much time reading, going to seminars and not doing much. The modest application of my knowledge from my learning is to invest in the stock market modestly, write in blogs, speak more clearly and participate in Toastmaster events. Is that a fruitful life? Perhaps I am experiencing a mid-life crisis. Or perhaps the events of the past few months have finally taken a toll in my mind. So I just need to take a break from my 'second' life.