Ass#@$%! Finish First

I found out about this book while looking at the bestseller list. It makes one mad that somehow one could succeed without the hard work and decency required from most people. It’s like hardship, dedication and perseverance is not important. One can be an asshole with boorish behavior and still come out on top. The author by the way is a college student who took law at Duke University. I guess the author is self-aware about himself which shows some hope towards redemption. Strangely one goes about preparing oneself by reading books, learning new skills and joining self-help organizations like Toastmaster but suddenly someone comes along and succeeds without really trying. Is life unfair? Is more about luck than hard work?

                                                       
These days one seems to be filling up one’s spare time reading too many books and watching the latest movies in DVD. All for the sake of self-improvement and being updated on the latest trends. So one spends time completing speeches and trying to be the best that one can be by doing meaningful work. But along come someone who may or may not be an asshole and seems to show that life is really a piece of cake. Someone who has not exerted the same diligent effort towards self-improvement or leading a meaningful life by doing good tasks. So the hardworking fool loses all his motivation and wonders if all is worth it. Does the hard work and dedication really matter? Does it provide any meaningful results?

Last night I happen to watch an excellent movie ‘An Education’ with Peter Sarsgaard and Carey Mulligan. It asks the same questions. Whether one should study diligently and go to college in Oxford and get a college degree. Or does one have fun having met someone (an asshole?) that goes to classical concerts and jazz bars, vacations in Paris and does some silly things like buying rare prints from old people in order to make money and live the lifestyle. The heroine chooses to quit school and go with the asshole and plan to get married while the girl’s parents mistakenly assume the asshole boyfriend is rich and well connected. The school teachers also admonish the young lady to no avail. But it turns out the boyfriend is married and been doing this peccadillo to other impressionable young ladies.

The heroine goes back to school, resumes her studies and makes it to Oxford and gets a degree in English. I guess these types of movies tend to insure that hard work and study does matter and one should not get distracted by assholes. But there are other assholes that are well intentioned and decent who just strives to make it through the day without exerting themselves, earning a salary with no intention of providing a deeper meaning to their lives. I guess a trivial existence is fine with them but they seem light weight and empty and one gets a bit angry with their presence. It seems their only existence is to make money and slightly boast about them to other people whose lives are not that easy. Of course, it’s not intentional and nothing is done in malice which makes them an asshole.

But there are bigger things in life and one should not get absorbed by such folks. One should not spend one’s life in envy but fill it with worthwhile activities. It’s the best antidote to an idle mind and everything lifts out and troubles disappear. I gave 2 speeches this week and I think have done good based on audience feedback. One is stressed with these challenges and compounded by the fact that there’s a project problem yesterday that caused further delay. But after completing the challenging speeches and relaxing at home and sleeping early restores the mind back to its serenity. One is ashamed of calling his mates assholes and perhaps the story is not finished yet. Maybe in the long run assholes don’t really finish first but an equal dose of problems occurs to everyone like that phrase in the Bible used by Hemingway in his book ‘The Sun Also Rises’.  

Big Picture Investing

I just finished Peter Navarro’s investment book called ‘Big Picture Investing’. There are sections of his work that refer to another book I read recently called ‘Reminiscence of a Stock Operator.’ The book is supposedly a memoir of the legendary speculator Jesse Livermore who accumulated and lost many fortunes during the 1920’s. A well regarded stock investor even today who killed himself because of his financial woes. I am not sure if he is the ideal model to aspire to. But his memoir is brilliant and gives a unique perspective from the early days of stock investing. He is a manipulator of markets similar perhaps to Gordon Gecko - the hero in Oliver Stone’s sequel to his previous movie hit ‘Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps.’ The theme of all these works is the stock trader or investor who actively monitors and invests in the market and makes a huge fortune. In Oliver Stone’s movies, the hero or villain (who can tell?) often end-up in jail, lose their fortune or commit suicide.

On the other hand, Mr. Navarro is a professor of finance in a California university. His book explained a few terms which I had taken for granted. For example, the term inflation which has 2 variations: cost-push and demand – pull. Or economic indicators categorized as leading, lagging or neutral indicators. Or terms like Outperform (i.e. better than the market index). He also clearly explains sector investing and following the business cycle in one’s investment plan. The last chapter I particularly liked which describes his typical investing day. At the start of the day, he reads magazines and web sites like Investor’s Business Daily,   Barron’s magazine, and Dismal Science and Market Watch. The book has given me a lot of investing ideas that I never thought of before. But similar to Jesse Livermore’s memoirs it’s leading one toward active trading. An investment style abhorred by investors like Benjamin Graham or Warren Buffet but a good technique to know.

I read an article in the New York Times of a banker who died recently of brain cancer. He worked as an investment banker for Goldman Sachs and Lehman Brothers before retiring. One guesses that he is familiar with the investment style mentioned above - active trading. But after his retirement he had an epiphany. In his last years he was motivated to write a book called ‘The Investment Answer’ which is the exact reverse of his previous investing style as a Wall Street banker. The advice of his book is simple. It follows the passive investing methods of people like Burton Malkiel who suggest investing on index funds instead of being stock pickers. Basic advice like hiring an independent financial adviser, diversify between foreign and domestic stock and bonds, value and growth stocks, choosing passive investing,  rebalance the winners and buy more of the losers. It’s not rocket science but more like common sense explained in previous books like ‘The Best Investment Advice You will Ever Need.’

Unfortunately, one is in the midst of severe economic problems that one wonders whether one requires drastic moves. For instance, the huge US deficit, quantitative easing, rise of China, political challenges in the US (i.e. rise of tea party and conservative politics), congressional plan to revise the tax code, falling housing prices, rising unemployment etc. One hears about the fall of the dollar and its replacement as the world reserve currency by something like the International Monetary Fund’s (IMF) Special Drawing Rights (SDR) which is based on a basket of currency and commodities like gold or even the Chinese Yuan. Times are changing and the usual financial advice may no longer be sufficient. One is attracted to the works of Nouriel Roubini known as Dr. Doom and his book ‘Crisis Economics.’ His predictions often seem extreme but these are not the best of times. Since coming to the USA, one has tried to exploit the situation – investing in housing to take advantage of low prices, low mortgage rates and tax credit as well as investing in the stock market (i.e. high cap multinationals - leaders in their fields, on the road to recovery, have international businesses, etc.) But is that enough?

The main issue is the fall of the dollar aggravated by the US deficit. Recent political developments don’t seem promising. One looks at the prospect of rising taxes, inflation and lower credits. From the big picture perspective one needs to increase one skills and knowledge especially in finance and possible increase one’s investments outside the US. For example, converting one’s US dollars to another currency and investing in real estate in places like the Philippines and Singapore. Some extreme pundits speak about avoiding stocks and bonds altogether. Hence, the financial investor today cannot just focus on stocks and bonds but other investment instruments like wine, art and real estate. 

Taking advantage of recent trends in the Internet with tools like Google, Amazon and Face book is a good goal in order to develop separate income streams. Afterward, creating a limited liability company (LLC) for tax breaks and employing one’s family in the business maybe the best way to earn money and pay lower taxes. This seems to be the way forward in a volatile economic environment. From a big picture perspective, the US does not seem to be the best country to live in for the long term unless innovative approaches are done by the political establishment based on a McKinsey report. The US is the laggard among the industrialized nations with countries like Singapore faring much better based on a New York Times article. Still there’s always a chance that things will change....um....yes we can?

Life after 46

A recent Economist article says that life begins at 46. Based on studies, 46 is the average age when people start feeling happy. Perhaps it’s due to the fact that most people at this stage have kids who finished college and leave home to seek their fortunes plus it’s the age were wisdom finally settles in. The line graph of a happiness index shows a downward trend starting in the 20’s until a bottom is reached at around age 46 and continually rises all the way to old age. At this point in one’s life, fear and anxiety don’t take too much of a person’s attention. Since coming here to the West one has felt that one feels more serene which I had attributed to the surrounding culture (i.e. less distractions, home by 8 pm, no Asian back stabbing, etc.).  But in fact, it’s not due to the new place but has biological or psychological explanations. It’s a good article that makes one think about one’s assumptions.

 

The article says that 2 dominant traits exist in people: neuroticism and extrovert. Neurotics are people who worry a lot and often unhappy. Extroverts are happy people with active social networks. Most people are a mix of both. One sees that one has been a neurotic most of one’s life perhaps driven by too much self-reflection and journal writing. The common answer to this trait is to see a psychiatrist so one’s mental churning can be regulated or guided by a professional. Another common answer perhaps is meditation and Yoga. This allows one to move towards being an extrovert by meeting people (i.e. gurus and therapists) as compared to staying alone in a room with one’s own thoughts. Joining group sessions like Toastmasters maybe another attempt towards being an extrovert. Group session like writing workshops and Toastmasters can be seen as attempts to be happy. Perhaps the happy index is working as one joins these sessions during his 40’s. No more fear and anxiety when meeting people.

One thinks that some cultures are predisposed to a certain trait. Perhaps Western culture is more towards extroverts with their sports culture and less self reflection. Eastern culture perhaps is more neurotic with their religion and beliefs like meditation. Striking a balance is needed as cultures try to learn from each other.  Moving to another country exactly when one turned 46 (give or take a few months) has been lucky because one would not be driven by self-doubt or anxiety as one usually would have. This was the problem one had when moving to Singapore at the age of 38 or 39 when the happy index was still moving down. Perhaps that explains one’s attempt to distract oneself through sports (tennis, golf, roller skating, biking and swimming), social activities (PMI meetings, museums, library and travel) and learning new things (guitar playing, visual thinking). There was truly a biological urge to fight stress driven by fear and anxiety.

Can one confirm that one is stressed? Premature balding is one sign and recent studies that show medicine that fights stress result in re-grown hair. One is glad that one has recognized this problem early on and the key to this fight is cognitive therapy. Reading the book ‘Managing Your Mind’ was a watershed and served the role as one’s psychiatrist. It has improved one’s thoughts and cognition and especially helped by visual thinking techniques to improve one’s clarity of thinking. It’s still an ongoing learning process that one must keep at all times. Life at the age of 46 is where everything comes together and one has to take advantage of this trend. Recognizing the internal changes that are going on as one grows old is the key. Exploiting that inner change is to one’s advantage especially exploiting the benefits offered by the new country with its extrovert leanings. Hence, attending Toastmaster meeting, writing workshops, going to library events are part of the upward curve in the happiness index.

Writing needs to become an extrovert exercise. This means working with groups, sharing ones work via attending the local library’s Scribbler sessions or writing workshops. The happiness index makes one more confident to try new things especially sharing one’s work with others and receiving feedback. In one’s personal lifetime, one did not have this fortuitous alignment of the stars until now. So one needs to move outward - from the internally driven writer’s angst that defined the romantic concept of a writer. It’s all about sharing, editing and following externally driven cues and attending workshops. It’s still going to be a difficult journey but one’s psychological makeup is positive with the upward curve of the happiness index. One must ride the curve upwards and exploit whatever advantages that may bring but not via reckless risk taking but a confident move bolstered by experience and inner happiness.

Links:
http://www.economist.com/

Street Art

Artists like Banksy, Shepard Fairey or even Mr. Brain Wash push the envelope on what art is. It brings the artistic sensibility to every day graffiti. It’s an attitude that is revolutionary because it challenges the public’s conception of art. It’s like a guerrilla campaign in the sense that it has to be done under cover from the authorities. The reason is that graffiti is considered thrash, made by juveniles who are defaming clean public walls. It’s not artistic expression by an act of denigration. But street artists like Banksy or Fairey raise graffiti to another level. For example, Fairey with his Hope poster has become mainstream and a symbol of the outsider and change. No one expected this type of art to become an icon in the sense that it’s also used by people like Glenn Beck but with the founding fathers as the subject of the art.

The fact that most graffiti art, even by these famed artists, are covered up or erased by the authorities gives a feeling of illicit excitement. One has to be efficient and extremely clever to make these painting at a short time in the night with possible threats of arrest by police officers. But in fact it’s a harmless activity and the resulting art is often very enlightening and insightful which is what art is supposed to do. The subject of these artists is usually anti-establishment which gives the authorities the motivation to erase these ‘graffiti’. It reminds me of the wall in Beijing where people can post anything even topics that are against the ruling class. In a way, these artists are equivalent to underground fighters like Che Guevara or Fidel Castro’s Cuban guerrillas or Mao’ communist army whose goal is to subvert the existing government.

But street artists only have humor, sarcasm and biting commentary as their weapons and have mass appeal to ordinary folks. Their viewpoints smacks of a people-based sensibility equivalent to Google’s ‘Do No Evil’ world view where their products are usually free to use. In fact the movie ‘Exit Through the Gift Shop’ is a mocking commentary on the art world. It places a mirror on a consumer based society who pays outrageous sums on painting while there are mass starvation and famine in other parts of the world. It’s a sensibility that requires change and has driven an “outsider” like Barack Obama to a position of power. There is no outcome in street art but to change the current perception of art as investment. Street art or graffiti is just erased no matter how good or valuable.

This viewpoint is expressed by Banksy in his film. The fact that so called works of art by Mr. Brain Wash is bought at auction in large sums is a joke turned inside out. But works by Banksy and Fairey are also bought at auction in large sums. They can become extremely wealthy with their work. So the joke goes back to them but in fact street art is often gone after the a few months so their artwork sold in auction are pieces made to be sold not painted on a wall. Their efforts to bring art to the masses is perhaps like Raphael painting in a street corner rather than painting for the rich and powerful who keep their art inside their salons or museums. But the fact that street art is ephemeral is mind changing because it teaches us not to value art the way society wants to.

Mainstream society believes that art is an investment, bought by millionaires to display in museums and enjoyed by art lovers who have pretensions towards high culture and refinement. Street art is disposable and supposedly without value except for momentary enjoyment by the passersby. But it is also a rare event as not all people can be there in those places where the art is painted. Instead one enjoys them in pictures or in documentaries. But it’s clearly the people’s art because it’s not commissioned by millionaires or sold at high prices in auctions. The motivation is not money but enlightenment. This people based motivation did not exist in the renaissance where only the privilege elite enjoyed art. Or, placed in a church to sustain an organized religion. Hence, it’s a revolution similarly to the guerrilla movement as it aspires to usurp the powers that be. Perhaps it’s like Google destroying the boundaries of old media by letting information be free. I guess street art is a reflection of the Google age.

Links:
http://www.banksy.co.uk/
http://www.banksyfilm.com/

An Object of Beauty

I finished reading Steve Martin’s new book during the weekend. It just took a couple of hours to finish. It seems a trivial work compared to Cormac McCarthy’s ‘Blood Meridian’ which I finished last Friday after listening to the audio book for several weeks. McCarthy is the successor to great American writers like Hemingway and Mark Twain. His work has a brutal and honest subtlety which is not found in contemporary writers who strive for gimmick and novelty. One immediately knows when reading the book that it’s a significant and mature work. Others pale by comparison. The subject matter is relevant with the recent upheavals in the Middle East. It strikes at the heart of the American conception of Manifest Destiny – a policy well known to affected peoples like Filipinos, Cubans, Vietnamese, American Indians and Mexicans. It’s a tough book to read but profoundly satisfactory.

‘An Object of Beauty’ by comparison is light reading. Martin does not have great prose style but he is a competent writer; able to focus on the right moment. I think it’s more a ‘technical’ book if one wants to understand the contemporary art scene or investing in art. One understands about the art business in general. Although it lacks the dense erudition of scholars, the book possesses the brilliant insights of a savant or synthesizer. Only one who is not an art scholar can write this book –someone like Steve Martin who is an artist of multiple disciplines (acting, screenwriting, musician and author). It’s a more effective book because it strips away the scholarly and academic tone that confuses rather than educates people. After reading the book I watched the Internet channel KQED which features art galleries and artists in San Francisco – a good complement. I also watched the documentary ‘Exit through the Gift Shop’ – a sardonic tale about street art.

Later I read a more scholarly tome called ‘Sacred and the Profane’ about the Italian renaissance. Part history book - part art - part critical commentary - part book review, it had the confusing dense prose that’s difficult to read. I just skimmed through the book as it took a lot of effort to understand. Simplicity is a requirement due perhaps to the information overload and increasing complexity in life. Outsized characters exists in the recent books or films I watched or read such as the Judge in ‘Blood Meridian’, the heroine in Martin’s book, Mr. Brain Wash in ‘Exit through the Gift Shop’ and the Japanese extremist in the documentary ‘The Emperors Naked Army Marches on’ – another documentary I saw in the weekend together with ‘The Cove’ about the slaughter of dolphins in Japan. Perhaps the complexity of life and the desire to succeed results in eccentric characters. A simple life of quiet and contemplation is sorely needed today.

Unfortunately, one did not have silent serenity and rest in the weekend. Still a mad rush to read as many books as one can or as many films or magazines as one can. Is there a secret to master the complexities of modern life? Perhaps Google has a way. One speed reads the book ‘Google Apps – the Missing Manual’ in an attempt to master the new lifestyle. Moving one’s data to the ‘cloud’ like calendars, tasks and to do list plus using multiple tools and mobile devices maybe one way to survive. There is a perceptible shift towards the Internet driven by Google technology and one has to master that landscape. Being a writer is no exception unless one would like to end up a nutcase like Mr. Brain Wash. One can see great things happening in the Internet especially watching films via Netflix, browsing channels using Boxee or Google Television. I think I am ahead of the curve in having this set –up at home which is just a laptop connected via HDMI cable to a flat screen television, and controlled by a small wireless keyboard and iPod Touch. Together with voice recognition and tablet computers, one is living in a future household.

Also documentaries and You Tube videos capture everyone’s attention today. Is this a significant shift or just a momentary fad together with the mobile tools just mentioned? Appropriately, Ken Auletta’s book on Google is subtitled ‘The End of the World as we Know It.’ The key maybe is understanding the moves of Google, Face book and Microsoft. Last night I tried a new Microsoft application called ‘Montage’ as well as explore Google Apps for small business. Both are interesting software that requires a change in mindset. It’s clear that old ways of doings things don’t work. Closer to home, my current project is a mess and one is trying different techniques similar to agile methods to keep going. But like the country at large, most people are not prepared for change. Appreciating art and design perhaps helps one cultivate a creative mindset (hence ones’ interest in art) but one has to apply creativity in one’s finances, writing life and work life to survive the new world.

 Links:

http://montage.cloudapp.net/montage/whatsmontage

Windy City

In Chicago for three days – arriving on Wednesday and leaving Friday. It was more like the South Land of Chicago. I worked in a warehouse in Monee about 45 minutes from Chicago Midway airport. I watched television most of the time in my motel room after coming from work. The news was mostly about Egypt and the mayoral elections with Rahm Emmanuel - the leading candidate. Rahm Emmanuel was Obama’s former chief of staff. The upheaval in Egypt was in its last days. I arrived in Chicago with Hosni Mubarak as president and came home three days later with his resignation in the news. He was not longer the president when I landed back in South Carolina. So from the perspective of world events it was an exciting three days.

Snow piled up in the sidewalks of Chicago. Some as high as 5 feet where I guess the snow were shoved out from the street. But it was not snowing although a snow storm enveloped the states of Arkansas, Texas and Missouri. Record snow falls were recorded in these Southern states whereas the Northern states where heavy snow is usually expected was relatively calm. No record rates recorded in Illinois, Michigan or New York. But it was cold when we arrived about -10 F. It was the coldest that I have experienced but it was not that bad. The forecast was -12 F so I had brought my old leather jacket given to me by my father and a black overcoat that I recently bought. It was too much to bring. I did not need to bring 2 coats and I paid for it by logging it through the airports.

We had planned to fly in as a team of about four but whittled down to two to minimize costs. I was not sure if I was to go until the last day when the project manager confirmed it. He was not able to go. So it was a two man team together with the support manager – a grizzled 30 year veteran. He was a sergeant in the armed forces and drives a truck on weekends. A great guy with lots of experience. We exchanged a lot of stories during our trip. On the first day we went to a family restaurant and had shrimp stir-fry with rice, on the second and last day I had steak, shrimp and vegetables at Applebee’s. For breakfast we had a buffet at a nearby trucker’s dinner called ‘The Iron Skillet’. There was a section of the restaurant marked for drivers; perhaps to signify better service. I ate too much in the buffet – sausages, bacon, corn beef and hash, scrambled eggs with onion and pepper, biscuit and gravy, orange juice and coffee. To give a semblance of healthy eating I ate slices of pineapple and cantaloupes.

Eating out in restaurants is often the best aspects of trips. Nothing fancy except it’s free. It was a fruitful trip that yielded new information.  It will help later once the new software is installed. I felt a bit uneasy coming into Chicago due to the cutback. I wrote emails to summarize the findings of the trip to the project team and software contractor. Minor changes are needed in the software. A test was undertaken back in the office; led by the new support staff. We worked together by phone although the new voice over internet phone did not work. I could hear the team speaking but they could not hear me. I wrote some email on the issues encountered in the test. At least I contributed to the testing while away. I guess this is the fun part – struggling with multiple things to do while on site in a different location.

We left Chicago under downcast skies with the temperature cool at 10 F. The return trip was via Atlanta. Earlier the trip to Chicago was through Detroit. The weather was great when I arrived home. After unloading my things, I went to the gym for a swim. The software contractor called me and we discussed the Chicago findings. Not much work needed for the changes. I went for my usual Friday swim – 30 minutes of laps, 15 minutes in the hot tub, 5 minutes swimming in the pool to cool off, 15 minutes in the steam room, shower and drive back home. It was a fast trip back and forth from Chicago. I learned about the city watching the local television programs and reading the newspapers. I hope I can come back someday in the project. But I did not feel the same excitement I used to feel when exploring the cities of Asia in my youth.

Kipling’s Cat

Kipling’s Cat is an excellent biography of a so-called Boston Brahmin. One of those original character who is extremely intelligent, outgoing and eccentric who enjoy life to the full. But he is not one of those who are born into great wealth but rather who are gifted and embody the old values of hard work, thrift and humility. The memoir was written by the daughter, herself a unique individual who also travels the world as a writer. Wyman the father reminds me of those eccentric Englishmen traversing the world in the Empire’s wide spread colonies. But it is not through the benefits of the American empire that the Boston Brahmin has exploited but on his own gifts as a scientist. One of those well educated people who practice science at the highest level; well-versed in mathematics as well as high culture. This marks his elitism.

It is a story of a life well lived with sojourns in Alaska, Japan, Cairo, Paris and Rome as well as his young life in New England and Boston. It describes scenes with wealthy Parisians, displaced white Russians, European scientists based in Rome, vacations in Paris and Belgium and Norway. He was also a good watercolor painter; conversant in painting and other arts. There is a picture of him stark naked beside a stream, calmly painting the scene before him, as he sat on the rocks beside a river, possibly somewhere in Europe or Alaska. It was that picture that made me borrow the book – an image of a well-educated Bostonian painting in the nude like it was the most normal thing to do. It speaks of an individuality that expresses itself in whatever form it can find its freedom. He had 3 marriages with the last one to an expatriate Russian who lived in a château in the French countryside. (It brings to mind a classic film I saw recently – the French film ‘Rules of the Game’ by Jean Renoir, son of the famous painter).

There are brief scenes of drama and intrigue with his association to Robert Oppenheimer who the government suspected of being a communist spy. Wyman’s posting in Japan was denied due to this link with Oppenheimer as well as his marriage to a Russian. Such was the atmosphere during the cold war. But his intelligence and scientific skills allowed him to be a treasured member of the European scientific community – living and working in Rome. His early youth seem privileged in a classic way but without the trappings of great wealth. Sailing in the summer, tennis games, hiking in mountain ranges, travels to South America and Europe, studies in Ivy League universities. It is a privilege life with a blue – blooded pedigree having ancestors who crossed the Atlantic during the early years of the Republic. There are no stories of ostentatious ness but frugality and near monastic existence and an abhorrence of materialism. Sometimes it even reeks of near poverty such is the New England distaste of frivolity.

The writer says that his father was not the examined life as best lived according to the Greeks. I disagree because it seemed to be a full life of education and travel without any excessive indulgence in vices or waste. Perhaps it is the training and awareness provided by their parents and perhaps the tradition of New England ways seeping down from the Old World that has established a life of purpose. Of course there are obvious shortcomings such as his role as a father when he left his children to relatives after the death of his first wife. But there are no harsh judgments here. Contrasted to the lives of the Vanderbilt or Astor offspring, for example, who seem to dissipate their existence with meaningless or trivial pursuits. I think Kipling’s Cat is a story of American nobility – the story of an aristocracy of hard work, discreteness, humility, elegant manners, good culture and travel - devoid of Hollywood excess and luridness.

Overall it is poignant and a well-written account, a daughter’s last elegy to a father and the wonderful life he lived. One can only wish to have lived that kind of life. He had never written great books or expressed any great insight but his life was his statement. The wonderful account of his daughter shows he had also succeeded as a father. To have produced a wonderful and nuanced writer possessing the old values of life, so much different from the scandal plagued lives in recent memory. It gives pause for people to think about their own lives and measure it to one who has lived in full with his own discreet, elegant anonymity and grace. The last years in Paris seemed like a fitting end to a person who loved to travel the world.  (Kipling’s Cat refers to line in a story by Rudyard Kipling about a cat that does not sit still but keeps moving).

Blood Meridian

Last weekend I watched a couple of DVDs about the Iraq War. The films were ‘Blood of my Brother’ and ‘Weapons of Mass Deception.’ Earlier in the week I read a few chapters of the book ‘Churchill’s Folly’ - about the creation of Iraq and much of the Middle East after the collapse of the Ottoman Empire in World War I. The common themes of these works are:  frequent upheavals in the Middle East mainly due to oil resources and attempts of Western Powers like US and England to control the political destinies of these countries. Corollary to the theme is the revolt of Arab peoples against foreign manipulation and the guerilla wars waged against the invaders. Of course, there are multiple perspectives:  an attempt to liberate the oppressed natives from a local tyrant or a naked attempt to grab control of oil resources from the viewpoint of Arabs.

Last week the revolt in Egypt filled the news whereas a few weeks before it was the revolution in Tunisia which overthrew the current president. These events seem to confirm the thesis of the Bush Neo Cons that the Iraq and Afghanistan invasions would herald an era of political reform and democracy in the Middle East. One would venture that change is indeed coming to the Middle East.  During the weekend, I managed to speed read a book called ‘Layover in Dubai’ – a cheesy story about murder, human trafficking of young women from Russia and Eastern Europe and turned into prostitutes to service the expatriate community living in the super city of Dubai. It’s also about the Arabs adjusting to the new global culture sweeping their land and the society’s underbelly of foreign workers from India or Pakistan building the modern skyscrapers littering the desert.
  

The upheavals in Tunisia and Egypt were facilitated by Twitter, Face book and other modern tools like text messaging and smart phones. Some reports even said these tools were effectively used by the authorities to stop revolts. Last week Internet access in Egypt was essentially shut down and wireless service slowed to a crawl. This is the new force driving change as well – driven by technology and social networks. I also skimmed through a technical book called ‘Google Hacks’ as I plan to increase my skills and knowledge especially on Google tools and social networking. I have been blogging for nearly five years with no monetary success. My motivation was to prepare for new employment but I guess it’s time to rise up. I have bought the Google vision and believe Google is ushering the next wave not only of technology but media and the way our lives will be lived in the future. It’s a more profound change than the Apple toys.

The weekend was again hectic – attending Toastmaster leadership training on Saturday and a lecture or dialogue between Thomas Jefferson and James Madison on Sunday which was fun, entertaining and educational. My youngest son came with me as I brought him to a practice soccer game after the event while I walked around the park for about 30 minutes. As I walked through the woods thinking about the bloody upheavals in the Middle East, I regretted not bringing the audio book I was listening to for the past weeks – Cormac Macarthy’s ‘Blood Meridian’. It’s a gore filled tale of scalp hunters, massacres of Mexicans and Indians in the South West during the 1800s’s, led by an insane judge who seems other worldly due to his infinite talents and skills – like a vast organization urging on senseless death and destruction. He seemed like Colonel Kurtz in Joseph Conrad’s ‘Heart of Darkness’. I can’t help but think of the bloody trail the armed forces has led from the jungles of the Philippines, Vietnam, Iraq and Afghanistan using the latest technology to subdue their opponents. The well regarded scholar Harold Bloom has called ‘Blood Meridian’ an American masterpiece; in the same league as the classic ‘Moby Dick.’

Listening to the bloody scenes from the book I wondered what the author’s point was or his metaphor until I saw the recent upheavals in the Middle East shown in documentary like ‘Blood of my Brother.’ Perhaps it’s a story of an America gone wild – moving away from the ideals of Jefferson and Madison.

Pilot Week

Another hectic week similar to those days in Asia. The only difference is that I have clarity of mind or awareness that I did not have back then. Maybe it is because everything is above board here and one has to express himself to be understood. In certain ways one is left alone in Asia to do one’s thing and one move forward with just a blind determination to succeed. There are also a lot of distractions that one can remove the stress of the day. No such distractions here except television or internet and a few cocktails while watching movies.  In Asia there is a floating world where one can lose himself and time seems to float by in a sensuous dream. No such indulgence in the Bible belt especially in the cold winter. One cannot escape the daily grind except live with it.

One notices that sleep is important here. Somehow in Asia one can go by the day even with less sleep. Somehow the floating world of indulgence can rest the mind. My morning Tai Chi serves as a way to focus due to the many diversion. In the West it is more of a way to focus the mind to prevent one from going insane. The reason is that without distractions, one cannot help but focus on the issue: write emails, discuss over the phone and so on. One does not have the opportunity to walk out during lunch time and choose the best place to eat with all the multitude of Asian choices. Here one stays in his cubicle, eating a sandwich or some snack to get by. After work one can go to the gym or directly home unlike in the East where one has many choices to indulge in.

A pilot run was scheduled this Friday which was again postponed. I was driving the charge and seem that I struck out again. The first was in Nevada and now here in home court. But I see no way forward except to gamble on a chance. It may seem reckless and I sometime doubt myself as well. I have taken a role which is not mine to take due to a vacuum.  But there is no way that I could lay back and rest because it will delay the project. So following the grand tradition of charging forward with out looking, I have gone ahead leading while others try to stop me or follow my lead. Now in the dregs of near failure and disaster, I see that others are laughing behind my back wondering why the project is taking nearly 2 years to finish. But again there is movement and the weekend will cool down nerves and one can see the full picture again.

One is faced with many issues but one has to move forward, calling the help desk, raising tickets, talking to every man and his dog, writing emails and trying to get things done. One is in a blur but it is the clear thought of someone with experience. Speaking with smart people from India, programmers from Ohio, experienced office workers, talking with the top dogs to make your voice heard. Strangely I sometime miss my morning Tai chi exercises which I rarely miss while in the East. Nevertheless I do not feel stressed as before which was more a blind dread of the future. Now all seems clear and the path is open perhaps due to the logical, linear thinking of the West as compared to the Eastern thinking where all things are linked and anything can happen. In the West, there seems to be a feeling of inevitability, like things moving forward as it should.

I guess it has been a wonderful week despite the failure of the pilot. In fact one would think that issues have been found during the testing. It is better to see the problems now than when it is in production. It is the thinking mind that brings people to grief, forever churning in the dark without external diversion, where dark thoughts arise. It is only through sleep and mediation that one can avoid the fate of insanity or cognitive decline. But despite the pressure and stress I think I have crossed a milestone and risen above the fray with self control, humor and insight that one has experienced this before and one would survive by keeping one’s nerve.

Twain Autobiography

Mark Twain has a new biography out. He stipulated in his will that his complete memoir be published 100 years after his death. The time has come and a California University is printing the full work as compared to the past where previous memoirs were heavily edited. Much has been mentioned of Ernest Hemingway’s famous quote that all American literature starts with Huckleberry Finn, Mark Twain’s famous work. It’s inspiring that this famous writer was a late bloomer – becoming a writer in his late 40’s and early 50’s. A self taught writer who is considered America’ greatest author, Mark Twain also has a warm spot among Filipinos after his opposing the occupation of the Philippines in the early 1900’s. He is one of those who write without fear, listening to only his conscience. It is conceivable that he would oppose the Iraq and Afghanistan invasions if he were alive today.

A short article in Newsweek featured the Twain autobiography. The magazine also included articles on the rise of self-publishing and electronic readers. It’s fitting that a famous self-taught writer who I believe self-published his first works to appear in a magazine talking about the latest trends in publishing. Mark Twain is all about the American spirit – self taught, independent, hard-working, humorous and wise with experience. The problem in the publishing world today, in fact with ‘old media’ is a poignant backdrop to the recent biography. But maybe all that is needed is the same pioneering spirit that Twain has shown. I had just finished reading Ken Auletta’s  book ‘Googled’ about the software giant Google. It’s a brilliant analysis of the changes sweeping the media landscape. Mark Twain would have had fun writing about the turmoil affecting the industry.

Last night I also watched the movie ‘Social Network’ about the new Internet phenomenon ‘Facebook’. It’s a good film that wonderfully depicts the rise of Internet companies and makes billionaires of its young founders. It’s a contrast to Mark Twain who had other jobs in life before settling as a writer and speaker near his middle age. But his work is just as revolutionary as any of the Internet pioneers. The common thread perhaps is striving towards a truth that is universal – whether it is written in a novel with a humor that is authentic and American or striving towards a new reality in technology. Both breakthroughs require a discipline and solitude that results in an insight that helps liberate people. Be it a novel that celebrates life or a new technology that enables change. Both result in transformation as one sees the world with new eyes.

From the Newsweek article, Mark Twain was always writing even when he was boy. He would write in small notebooks about anything that interested him. There was a passage about the death of his beloved daughter and he wrote about his grief in an attempt to rise above sadness. One sees that he was using writing as a sort of psychological release; similar to journal writing or blogging. So there is hope for writers like me who started journalizing as a way to keep sane and understand life. It is a lonely solitary life similar to the Facebook creator in the movie who tirelessly punched his keyboard long into the night - creating a new program that would revolutionize social networking. He was also a blogger who wrote down his thoughts whenever he faced personal problems like being dumped by his girlfriend.

I guess the point is that ‘new media’ has made the life of a writer easier. One could make his own platform or soapbox to write and proclaim his views. There is an immediate audience out there if one is lucky but altogether much easier than in Mark Twain’s time. The technology has provided tools that everyman can use including self-publishing to electronic readers and higher royalties for the writers. Companies like Google have even made their services free and empowered bloggers with a chance to earn money via AdSense. Unfortunately, there is no modern Mark Twain who has arisen in the new media landscape. Perhaps he is writing now in the blogosphere utilizing the latest media tools that companies like Google have provided. One cannot help but be amazed what a truly great company Google is with all the tools that are provided free and help people actualize their dreams.